Amọtẹkun

"Chaos is order yet undeciphered' - Jose Saramago

***

NOVEMBER 27, YEAR 2047

The mystery behind the narrative I bring forth transcends far beyond the scope of any man's comprehension. This great perplexity which seized me on my death bed, in the middle of a hot summer night, began simply with a rather astonishing encounter. But before I take you on this chaotic expedition that is my life, I'll like to briefly conform to certain esthetic standard of correctness. I'm Folarin Oluwadamilare Adams, an African American with roots which can be traced back to Nigeria. Diaspora, the fiery wind of change wafted my parent to this country shortly before I was conceived, while the inevitable tentacles of death prematurely wrenched them two months shy of my seventh birthday. After their death, I was raised by foster parents. I never married for I could never stay committed to a woman. I have been alone all my life.

My peculiar experience began several years after my parent's demise. I was a Zoology professor at the California state university, and I enjoyed my job immensely, for nothing gave me greater joy than teaching people about animals. When I wasn't teaching, I volunteered in the state zoo, for nothing gave me greater satisfaction than tending to animals. My life was perfect. It was exactly as I wished it till I began experiencing severe cough, weight loss, fatigue and a piercing pain in my chest. I'd just turned forty seven, and thus wrongly deduced that these symptoms had manifested due to my advancement in age, so I paid it no mind till I collapsed one hot afternoon.

I was rushed to the hospital where the lab ran a battery of tests. Hours later, the test results came back along with my whole world crashing. I was dying from a mysteriously aggressive cancer tumor, and had approximately twelve weeks to live. My sorrow had been great for I'd never smoked them cancer sticks. My denial had been deep, for it'd been ironic that I would die from lung cancer when a compulsive smoker like Professor Collins, a man whom I greatly detested, continued to draw breath. So in a bid to defy the odds, I tried all forms of medications, experimental, holistic and unorthodox methods amongst others, but it was to no avail.

As my life dwindled, I was afforded enough time to reflect on my past choices, and steps I could have taken differently. I also found myself frequently gazing out the window, for I'd found solace in watching the animals foraging at the edge of the forest which bordered the hospital. Sometimes, the birds would come over to sing sweet enticements to my ears. Other times, squirrels and beavers would come over to entertain me with their antics. There was nothing strange about the attention I received, for I'd always possessed an uncanny connection with animals. There also existed an understanding which was accompanied with an overflowing feeling of euphoria when I gazed into their eyes and comprehension glimmered.

It was with great grief that these animals came as kindred souls to ease my passage. It was also with greater joy that they came to celebrate my life in its passing. So these pleasurable visits were encouraged until something both terrifying and exciting transpired. I'd been snoozing one afternoon when a sudden chilling silence stirred me up from my slumber. When I looked out my window, I was beheld by the strangest of sights. Under the bright sunlight, a pair of eyes glowed like the ceremonial goblet of an Egyptian Pharaoh. Behind these golden eyes was a magnificent specimen of an unparalleled elegance. In those terrifying eyes was a conscious super intelligence not akin to any leopard I've ever laid eyes on, or any other animal for that matter.

"The course of a man's life is often times shaped by a chanced or preordained encounter"

From the moment I laid eyes on this grand specimen, I was totally encapsulated by the magical aura it exuded. For days, it watched me as though bidding its time. For days, I wished for it to be before me, but it never did, not until on my last night in this world. On that night, I remembered slowly drifting into that painless state of the beyond when I suddenly felt a presence in my room. When I opened my eyes, I beheld a strange black man by my bedside. When his fiery eyes found mine, it pierced my soul as though my darkest shame had been laid bare for all to make mockery of. When I looked into his eyes, I knew the true import of terror and was thus suddenly filled with an unquenchable dread in my heart.

As I struggled to be away from his presence, I suddenly heard his deeply accentuated voice claiming that he was now before me as I'd wished for these last days. By the time the implication of what I heard sunk in, a cold sweat had broken out of me. By the time the sharp claws of trepidation crept up my spine, two very unimaginable and astonishing realizations hit me before I fell into a faint. The first was that this man was the beast that had kept a death watch these last days. The second was that the man hadn't opened his mouth when he'd uttered those troubling words; he'd spoken in my head through some sort of dark sorcery.

I am not sure for how long I was out, but when I opened my eyes again, the man was now staring out the window and into the night. Without turning to address me, his voice assaulted my head again, this time, telling me to be at ease for he came in peace. He also pleaded for my patience for he had a tale to tell, then an exciting proposition to make; a proposition I shouldn't, wouldn't and couldn't refuse even if I wanted to. When he finally turned, a smile which sent chills through me replaced his stoic demeanor; a smile which combined with his accursed eyes, bore a look I wish I would forever forget.

*

"The price of providence is often times too great a burden to bear for one man"

His tale began hundreds of years ago in the then Oyo Empire, South-western Nigeria. He spoke of a peaceful village called Okẹ Arigbajo, a gifted Ajẹ and a monstrous Amọtẹkun. He spoke of how it was believed that this Ajẹ could successfully traverse between our physical realm and the spiritual, a feat which bore grave consequences for any other who tried it. He spoke of how this Ajẹ also had a very strong link with animals; a link closely related with his ability to traverse the spiritual because animals were the revered messengers of the deities. Finally, he spoke of how this Ajẹ had the rare gift of being one and the same with any animal of his choosing.

This young Ajẹ was an orphan named Akanbi. In the Ajẹ coven, Akanbi was considered a late bloomer and thus an anomaly because an Ajẹ's potentials always manifested twelve full seasons after their birth. Akanbi's hadn't manifested till after his eighteenth, but despite this, his potentials were so great that the other Ajẹs turned green with envy at his mere sight. His unharnessed powers were so rare that they made mockery of him out of spite. Also, because his powers were late in manifesting, it was proclaimed by all that it'd be harder for him to master his powers, and their proclamation rang true for many seasons.

Seven seasons after his manifestation, Akanbi who was now married with a son, still struggled with his powers. It would be a grave injustice to claim that his failure had been due to lack of commitment or effort, for at that point, he could traverse between both realms, but only for a short time. His stumbling block was that to reach his full potentials, he needed to totally rid himself of all negative energy. To seize full control of the spiritual, he needed the darkness and light in him to be one and the same. Only then could he claim the spiritual for his. Only then could he manage to retain any animal shape of his choice for an indefinite time.

Immediately Akanbi's learning began, he was assigned to a coven, to be mentored by another seasoned Aje called Agbaje. During his tutorage, Agbaje warned him of the grave dangers involved with using his untrained powers. He was warned of the unknown consequences of visiting the spirit realm without proper guidance. It was made explicitly clear that till he was completely adept in its use, he should never venture in unbidden. But halfway through his seventh season, a grave danger befell his village and thus stalled his education. A blood thirsty Amọtẹkun had made his village its hunting ground, and within seven days, it had claimed three children and badly mauled a woman. 

 The village's fear was great, for Yoruba folklore claimed that after an Amọtẹkun tasted human flesh, it will never hunt another. It was believed that human flesh which was rich in spiritual energy made an Amọtẹkun more powerful and almost invincible. It was also believed that as the beast continued to feed, it will become ravaged with rabidness, so all the hunters and Ajes were mobilized. They searched the forest for several market days, but none got a whiff of the beast, even though seven amongst their ranks had lost their lives to it. While they toiled to put an end to the beast's reign of terror, Akanbi and the other new Aje initiates were ordered to remain with their families, and it would have remained so if the beast hadn't taken Akanbi's only son, Abodunrin.

When the terrible news reached Akanbi's compound, his wife Adunni crumbled to the ground in sorrow. She was inconsolable, for she believed that Abodunrin was forever lost to them. But Akanbi, who was also in mourning, knew that there was still a way if certain steps were taken quickly. Abodunrin's salvation lay in the common knowledge that when the sadistic beast took the children, it mysteriously didn't kill them immediately, rather it carried them alive to its lair to toy with before devouring. He also knew that only he possessed the power to track the beast, and that if he didn't do something, he'd never forgive himself.

So Akanbi quietly left his weeping wife slipped into his personal shrine and began to recite series of incantations. Three hours later, Akanbi stumbled out covered in blood that oozed out from several deep cuts. Upon seeing Akanbi bleeding profusely, his wife and sympathizers rushed to his aid, but he weakly waved them away, before gesturing for one of the men to come forward. When the man approached him, Akanbi gripped his neck tightly and then began to whisper slowly into his ears till the man's eyes bulged in shock. When Akanbi was done, the man got up and ran out of the compound.

From that day, Akanbi became a village hero for he'd prevailed over the beast. But while the people celebrated his valor by weaving songs of praises in his name, the Ajẹs brooded over the peculiar circumstances surrounding the death of the beast. They wondered how Akanbi had managed to traverse into the spirit realm to save his son without repercussions. They wondered about what may have transpired, for they feared a lasting damage on Akanbi's psyche as a result of a backlash from the deities. Most importantly, they dreadfully wondered what he'd conjured or transformed into to be able to leave the beast in the ripped up state they'd found it.

During his recuperation, the ravaging fever he endured erased the memories of his spiritual conquest. Therefore, the only real proof of his heroics was the fur of the dead beast that was brought back to him as a reminder of his unflinching bravery in the face of great danger. Three moons late, Akanbi was finally healed so he returned to his learning, and soon became adept in traversing between both realms. He excelled at everything, save for being able to be one and the same with any animal of his choosing because it was postulated that his harrowing experience had created a spiritual block to that ability.

Seventeen seasons later, the memories of his experience were now almost a distant blur, only to be briefly remembered at night when he laid down to sleep on the fur of the beast. During this time, Akanbi lived a prosperous life, had many children and harmony thus prevailed till a strange metamorphosis began to occur in him. The changes which were first noticed by his wife were initially slowed, subtle, and almost imperceptible. But two moons later, it became frighteningly obvious that his hair and nails were growing at an alarming rate. His canines had become sharper. His eyes glowed at night. His sight, hearing and smelling had grown unnaturally keener. Worse, the sight and smell of cooked food greatly repulsed him.

 This strange transformation continued with frightening rapidity till he woke to the screams of his wife one morning. Her screams had startled him awake but before he could understand what had happened, he charged out of the house with the half eaten corpse of his last son in his wake. Akanbi had transformed into the very thing he'd slain several seasons back and ironically, his first kill had been his own son. It was as though destiny had righted a wrong. It was as though destiny had restored the unjust and delicate balance of the universe by ensuring his last son replaced the first one he saved several seasons back.

"Actions are the very seed of fate because our every deed blossom to become our destiny"

For several seasons, he wrought terror on his village as he hunted and slaughtered his people with impunity. He fed on their flesh and lapped at their blood till it ravaged him with rabidness. But after the seventeenth season, he woke up in the forest a man again, only that this time, he was twenty five seasons old; the same age he'd been when he'd first slew the beast. Akanbi tried to make sense of this maleficent metamorphosis, but no explanation was plausible to his troubled mind. For days, he groveled in self-pity as he mourned all the people he'd slaughtered. For several market days, he wished for an end to his existence, but the deities refused to smite him. In the end, he decided to walk away from Okẹ Arigbajo, never to set sight upon it again.

During his self-imposed exile, Akanbi came upon the peaceful village of Araromi, where he decided to settle down in. He was of the opinion that he was blessed since he'd regressed in age, had a new identity and a fresh start at life. So he kept his past a secret, used his powers to become their Babalawo, remarried, raised a family and was loved by the people. But seventeen seasons later, the whole vicious cycle began again. This time the transformation progressed with amazing rapidity as some changes took place overnight, while others days. Dreading the worst, he left the village, and his worst fears were revealed when he woke up in the forest days later. He'd already transformed again, and underneath his bulk was the half eaten carcass of a child.

 His life became a nightmarish roller coaster ride; a life forever trapped in an infinite loop of a seamless and aberrant metamorphosis. He'd live for seventeen seasons as a beast, wake up one morning as a man of only twenty five seasons, and then live another seventeen before morphing into a beast again. Throughout this unholy metamorphosis, his fur from his first kill mysteriously remained with him no matter what. He'd abandoned this conspicuous companion on several occasions. More than once, he'd shredded the insidious fur with a knife. He'd also burnt and buried the ashes of the regenerating fur, but it was for naught because the abomination followed him everywhere like a second skin.

 

In an attempt to be rid of his accursed existence, Akanbi scoured the countryside in search of answers. When he couldn't find them, he searched the continent of Africa and its neighboring islands. His search went on for over thirty seasons without bearing fruit, so he searched in Asia, Europe and the Americas till he came upon a Native American folklore which sent excitement coursing through his veins. This folklore spoke of people who were referred to as skin walkers because they possessed the ability to transform into any animal they desired, though this feat can only be achieved after they'd first donned the fur of the said animal.

There were many variations of the folklore, but the most popular were those of the Navajo's 'Yee Naaldlooshii'. In one version it was said that people gained this power upon initiation into the witchery way. In another version, it was believed that people who have attained the highest level of priesthood, and then commit the act of killing a family member gained this evil power. In yet another version, it was said that they were people who'd gained the evil power by breaking a cultural taboo.

At this point, Akanbi believed he had finally found where his questions could be answered, so he began his search for a 'Yee Naaldlooshii'. For twenty three seasons, he searched the Navajo region determined, never faltering, never giving up till his diligence was rewarded one night. One that faithful night, he was camped near a hill, when he felt eyes boring into him. When he got up to investigate, his eyes beheld the strangest of imageries. Atop the hill, the most unlikely pair of a man and a monstrous beast stood watching him.

For several minutes, both parties accessed each other till the man bent towards his companion as though giving it instructions, before approaching Akanbi alone. When he got to the camp, he introduced himself as Manulito from the Comanche tribe and that he was a 'Yee Naaldlooshii'. He then told Akanbi that he knew he'd been searching for his kind with good intentions, and it was for that sole reason he'd finally made his presence known. Finally, he proclaimed that a great burden weighed Akanbi, before urging him to lay his worries down in the hope of finding a solution.

So Akanbi told his sad tale from the beginning. He spoke for hours, not once did he pause, not once did Manulito interrupt him. When he was done, Akanbi breathed a deep sigh of relief before he sat back to observe his guest who was now deep in thought. An hour went by but Manulito hadn't moved, and just when Akanbi began to show signs of impatience, Manulito coughed. When Akanbi looked into Manulito's eyes, sorrow clouded them. When Manulito finally opened his mouth to speak, Akanbi could hear pity dripping heavily from every word he uttered.

He proclaimed that Akanbi had committed a great sacrilege by killing an animal in the spirit realm. He claimed that certain animals were sacred messengers of the deities, and amongst them, the leopard was held at the highest esteem. He claimed that because Akanbi had killed the beast in the spirit realm rather than in the physical, its life force had entwined with his, and since both their life force now coexisted in one body, they'd forever take turns to live out their respective cycles. It was for that reason Akanbi and the beast were now one and the same. It was also for that same reason he transformed every seventeen years, for that was a leopard's average life span.

He claimed that by slaying the beast, Akanbi had set in motion a process which was irreversible unless death came along; a choice, already denied Akanbi by the deities. He said that the damage done was almost permanent less Akanbi was willing to commit another sacrilegious ritual. He said that this ritual may help transfer his curse to another who was from his bloodline and gifted with the exact Aje powers. He warned that this wicked act wouldn't give Akanbi back his life, rather, it will offer him physical release totally devoid of eternal rest, so he appealed to Akanbi to desist from that path, for there was no rest for the wicked.

"The wicked are like the raging ocean whose troubles cast up mire and dirt"

Despite the admonition, Akanbi remained steadfast on his resolve, so Manulito proceeded to tell him what must be done. First, he gave Akanbi a list of obscure ingredient that would be used to create a binding portion. Then he taught Akanbi the summoning spell that would seal this unfortunate person's fate. Finally, he told Akanbi that he'd have to first afflict the said person with a deadly malady. He said that only at the point of death would the ritual be successful, for it was only at the exact moment when a life had trickled, could another life force take possession. He warned that not a moment before or after the life trickles out, or the ritual would fail.

*

 At this point, the strange black man whom I now believed was Akanbi stopped his narrative to look out the window. When he turned back, he said to me, 'time is running out, for daylight is nearly upon us'. Then he asked, do you now understand why I'm here? Do you now know your role in life's capricious plot? Do you now know how significant you are to my salvation?

All I could manage after he'd asked those questions was a look of incredulity, for I was stunned beyond words. There was also this lingering bitter taste in my mouth, for long before his story had ended, I'd already connected the dots and thus gladly welcomed my impending death with a joyous heart. For the first time since my affliction, I was so happy to die. In fact, I now wanted to die so badly, I began to pray for it. I now wished for my death so badly, that my eyes brimmed with tears.

After asking these questions, he began to rub something sticky all over my body. I tried to fend him off but all efforts proved abortive. I even tried to reason with him but my pleas fell on deaf ears. When he was done, he told me that he felt no remorse for what he was about to do. He said he'd suffered too long for an innocent mistake he'd made, and it was only right that someone else bore the pain. He'd searched for me for over sixty three seasons, and he'd come to understand that hope was man's greatest weapon. He also claimed to have lived for over three hundred fifty seven seasons and he'd come to understand that death was the one true gift to man.

He rambled about how he'd been cursed with immortality, and thus doomed to exist in a chaotic whirlpool of torment. He went on about how he'd seen the horror in the eyes of his several human families every time he transformed; he claimed to have tasted their terror during each experience. He'd blabbed about how he'd seen murder in the eyes of each of his several Amọtẹkun families, every time he transformed back into a man; he claimed to have relived every moment they'd hunted him down, not recognizing him, not remembering.

But now that he could be set free forever, he'd gladly leave with his head held high, so he began to recite the final incantation that would seal my fate. Soon I began to feel a tingly sensation as though my whole body was lit on fire. Afterwards, I began to feel excruciating pain as though all my insides were being wrenched out. As I experienced these terrifying sensations, Akanbi began to slowly disintegrate before my very eyes. As Akanbi turned into dust, a new kind of energy began to flow into me. As Akanbi finally withered into nothingness, his rancorous and victorious laughter reverberated all over the room.

*

I woke up later that morning a completely healed man. Everyone thought it a miracle, but I knew otherwise. Everyone wished me well, but I knew what lay ahead of me, so I went about living my life carrying a beast, a man and his burden in me. At the beginning, all I ever heard was his torturous voice screaming in my head, but over time I learnt to shut it out. I know not what may have gone awry that night. It probably was always meant to be. It is also probable that it was exactly what Manulito had warned Akanbi about, for even though Akanbi's physical vessel may have passed on, his life force still lives within me pleading for release. He now views the world through my eyes, forever doomed to eternal unrest.

Akanbi was now my unwitting prisoner, never to participate physically in life, forever to be at the periphery and thus insignificant. Fifty one years has now passed since my unfortunate encounter with him, yet I wonder if his present state of ceaseless anguish was enough justice for him. I haven't aged a day, yet on happy days I shed a tear for him. I am never ill, yet on lonely nights I wonder if I'd someday be free of this burden. I'm blessed with inhuman strength, yet on sad days I wonder if I'd have the heart to subject another human to this kind of existence. I'm immortal, yet on cold nights, I tell myself that I'll probably do to another the same thing Akanbi did to me, if I live as long as he had lived.